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Eighty per cent of mums on a low family income said they felt guilty about how they brought up their children, according to a major survey released today.
Some 42% said this was because they could not afford to pay for their children to take part in the same activities as their friends and 18% said it was because they did not have the money to allow their kids to keep up with the latest fashions and gadgets.
The survey also revealed that in the last year nearly two thirds of mums have struggled to cover the cost of their day-to-day living expenses and 80% of those with a low family income have had to make cut-backs.
This includes 54% who have had to cut back on buying their children new clothes and 16% having to cut back on buying fresh fruit and vegetables for their children.
This had led to 39% of mums having to rely on overdrafts and 36% having to borrow from friends and family to get by.
Psychologist Dr Linda Papadopoulos said: “One of the most important things to do to help the family cope with financial concerns is to talk about it as a family, and work together to get through it. By involving the whole family, obviously in a way that is age appropriate for each child, this will give a sense of control and empowerment over the situation. It will also engender a more positive attitude in that you are working as a team towards a common goal.”
The survey reveals that nearly half of mums say money worries are affecting their relationships with their children.
And even more say financial concerns are putting a strain on their relationship with their loved ones.
The poll, conducted by Turn2us and Home-Start on the parenting website Mumsnet, revealed 43% of mums said their relationship with their children was affected by money worries and this rose to 59% for mums with a family income of £28,000 or less.
And 49% of mums with a low family income said they were sometimes grumpy and snappy with their children because of money worries with 13% even saying they felt their children resent them because they are unable to afford to buy them what they want.
Carolyn Longton, founder of Mumsnet, said: “Financial anxiety can definitely impact on family life and Mumsnet's discussion boards are full of conversations about how tough it can be to make ends meet. It's important that those who are struggling financially know that they are not alone and we know that being able to share their anxieties on Mumsnet as well as getting practical help and support from charities like Turn2us and Home Start can be of enormous benefit not just to the mother, but to the whole family.”
Mums with money worries also said financial concerns put a strain on their relationships with their other halves, including 76% of mums with a low family income. Some 41% said they often argued about money worries and 28% said they do not get to spend enough quality time together because one of them is always working – with 33% unable to go out on their own together because they cannot afford to pay for a babysitter.
Turn2us, who commissioned the survey with Home-Start, helps people understand the often complex world of benefits and grants through its free to use website.
Director Alison Taylor said: “Many of the families who visit Turn2us are struggling to pay their bills and put food on the table, let alone pay for luxuries like babysitters.
“Mums face enormous pressures in their day-to-day lives but we would like to remind mums in financial need that there is help out there and they should visit the Turn2us website to make sure they are claiming all the benefits and grants they are entitled to.”
Turn2us, has also teamed up with Home-Start, who offer emotional and practical support to families with at least one child under the age of five. The Home-Start volunteers are to be trained to offer personalised support to the families they already visit to help them find grants and benefits available to them.
Kay Bews, Chief Executive of Home-Start UK, said: “Home-Start volunteers will not be shocked by these results as many of the mums they visit have financial worries which consequently impact on their day-to-day lives, affecting their relationships with those closest to them.
“We would urge mums in financial need not to suffer alone but seek the help that is available to them.”
For further help contact www.turn2us.org.uk and www.home-start.org.uk.
For further information please contact: Laura Johnston, Press Officer. Telephone: 020 8834 9260. Laura.johnston@elizabethfinn.org.uk. Hythe House, 200 Shepherds Bush Road, London, W6 7NL.
Notes to Editors:
About the Turn2us-Home-Start survey on Mumsnet
- 1327 parents completed an on-line survey on Mumsnet between 1-21 February 2010.
- 483 respondents had a family income of £28,000 or less.
- ‘Low income’ refers to mums with a family income of £28,000 or less. (Joseph Rowntree Foundation: A minimum income standard for Britain in 2009. Based on views of members of the public, a couple with two children need to earn £27,600 in order to afford a basic but acceptable standard of living)
Turn2us and Home-Start link
- Turn2us, Home-Start and the Child Poverty Action Group have teamed up to deliver a new service to help families in need claim the money available to them.
- Thanks to funding from the Department for Children, Schools and Families, Home-Start volunteers are to be trained to help the families they visit access the benefits and grants they are entitled to.
About Turn2us
Turn2us helps people in financial need access the money available to them – from welfare benefits, grants and other financial help – through its comprehensive website (www.turn2us.org.uk) and freephone helpline.
- Turn2us services are free, confidential and accessible, enabling people in financial need to access welfare benefits and charitable grants information quickly and easily – all in one place.
- The Turn2us website contains a number of accessible, easy-to-use, tools, such as a benefits checker, grants search and Find an Adviser tool.
- Turn2us is part of the Elizabeth Finn Care charity.
- Turn2us helps grant-giving charities reach people in need even more effectively by creating a single access point to information on charitable funds.
- Around 13.5 million people in the UK live below the poverty line, including four million children, despite the fact that £16.8 billion of welfare benefits went unclaimed from 2007-2008 (source: DWP and HMRC) and thousands of grant-giving charities exist that give grants to people in financial need.
Home-Start is the UK’s leading family support charity. Home-Start recruits and trains volunteers to support parents with at least one child under the age of five. Its home visiting work is unique in the UK. The charity was set up in 1973 and now has 336 Home-Starts across the UK supporting nearly 34,000 families and over 71,000 children each year. Almost 16,000 volunteers visit families in their own homes – parents supporting other parents in a variety of situations including isolation, bereavement, multiple births, illness or disability.
About Mumsnet
Launched in 2000 by two new mothers, Mumsnet is the UK’s largest online parenting community – a place where parents can share advice, product recommendations and friendship. For more information email insight@mumsnet.com